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Men.

So, there's this guy. There's been this guy since July. He's not my boyfriend. He's my best friend. Or, at least of the male kind. I'm not his best friend. We're just friends.
Lately, all this guy and I have been doing is fighting. But if you asked him, I know you would get a different response, because fighting indicates that there's something to fight about, which indicates that there is something there between him and I that makes mentioning that we're fighting, worth it.
But we're so totally fighting.
And it so totally sucks. Which is all I really wanted to say, here.

being a teenager is overrated.

I think it’s perfectly acceptable to stalk the guy who loves you on Twitter, especially when he talks about you at least once every 10 posts…
But I still feel guilty. Maybe it’s because I’m getting unfair access into his head. Even though I pretty much have assumed everything he’s said… Gah. I hate this.
He's been in love with me, from what I can gather, for over 6 years. Which isn't cool, since I haven't seen him in, like, 8. I know it's not real feelings. It's attachment. And it's unfair to him to think it's something more, and it's unfair to me to feel trapped and be the object of his affection, when he and I both deserve better. I can't date him because I know it'd just feed his obsession. Maybe I'm sounding mean; but this will be better than anything. Especially in the long run.
But why am I maybe going to the school with him for that band thing, on Thursday?
I guess because I am a sadist.
Aaron was right. I am crazy. And a bitch.
I wish saying "no" would be as easy for me as it was for other people...
(I pray that this makes sense. I can barely thing straight.)

Writer's Block: On the Go

How do you listen to music and watch videos on the go?

My iTouch, foo'. It's my best fran.

Day Twenty-five.

Day 01 → Your favorite song.
Day 02 → Your favorite movie.
Day 03 → Your favorite television program.
Day 04 → Your favorite book.
Day 05 → Your favorite quote.
Day 06 → Whatever tickles your fancy.
Day 07 → A photo that makes you happy.
Day 08 → A photo that makes you angry/sad.
Day 09 → A photo you took.
Day 10 → A photo of you taken over ten years ago.
Day 11 → A photo of you taken recently.
Day 12 → Whatever tickles your fancy.
Day 13 → A fictional book.
Day 14 → A non-fictional book.
Day 15 → A fanfic.
Day 16 → A song that makes you cry (or nearly).
Day 17 → An art piece (painting, drawing, sculpture, etc.).
Day 18 → Whatever tickles your fancy.
Day 19 → A talent of yours.
Day 20 → A hobby of yours.
Day 21 → A recipe.
Day 22 → A website.
Day 23 → A YouTube video.
Day 24 → Whatever tickles your fancy.

Day 25 → Your day, in great detail.
Day 26 → Your week, in great detail.
Day 27 → This month, in great detail.
Day 28 → This year, in great detail.
Day 29 → Hopes, dreams and plans for the next 365 days.
Day 30 → Whatever tickles your fancy.

My day in great detail? Well, let's see, I woke up late, went to pee, went downstairs, got dressed, put on mascara, got my shoes on and got into the car. Went into work 30 minutes late, started to help Paula with the dishwasher, then went and filled peanut-butter cups due to Connie's demand, and we talked about tomorrow being my last day, wandered around the kitchen a bit, then it was lunchtime. Went and sat down and ate, talked ACT scores with Maggie and Sam, and then heard about Cassandra and Maggie and everyone's New Year's. Got up to go back into the kitchen to work, and Clara gave me an invite to go tubing/skiing on the 21st (which is a terrible date, since I may be in California, or at Winter Formal with Jessica). Went back into the kitchen, did the dishwasher for the next two hours. Andrew came into the kitchen to drop off a package, and I ogled him for a minute. Then more dishwasher, then I mopped the back half of the room, then I got my coat and purse and left. Went to try to look for the lens cap that I lost on Powderpuff night, but Dad was already pulling up, so I abandoned that thought, we drove home and talked, listening to the Rocky Horror Glee soundtrack that I got him for Christmas. I went upstairs and fooled around on the computer, talked ACT scores with Dorothy, Facebooked, IMed, etc, until Melissa came over at 4:40 something, and then went downstairs and we talked about Tyler and his latest psychopathic adventure for about an hour. Went up and spent time on computer, talked to Christina about our friend, took computer down, made pizza rolls because my family apparently ate my pizzas while I was at Jamie's house. Had some major giggle breakdowns due to Dad, made cheese sticks, told Mom goodnight, and continued to have fun with Dad and Josh, then Josh went to bed, and Dad and I turned on Crime and Punishment, which I am watching now, as I type this up. Voila; my day.

Writer's Block: Conversation starters

Are there any subjects you either embrace or totally avoid talking about when you meet someone new?


I usually embrace talking about my family, my schooling, my taste in music, movies, and television programs. I usually avoid talking about my depression, hospitalization, sophomore and junior year, and my family (certain aspects). At least, right off the bat.
Day 01 → Your favorite song.
Day 02 → Your favorite movie.
Day 03 → Your favorite television program.
Day 04 → Your favorite book.
Day 05 → Your favorite quote.
Day 06 → Whatever tickles your fancy.
Day 07 → A photo that makes you happy.
Day 08 → A photo that makes you angry/sad.
Day 09 → A photo you took.
Day 10 → A photo of you taken over ten years ago.
Day 11 → A photo of you taken recently.
Day 12 → Whatever tickles your fancy.
Day 13 → A fictional book.
Day 14 → A non-fictional book.
Day 15 → A fanfic.
Day 16 → A song that makes you cry (or nearly).
Day 17 → An art piece (painting, drawing, sculpture, etc.).
Day 18 → Whatever tickles your fancy.
Day 19 → A talent of yours.
Day 20 → A hobby of yours.

Day 21 → A recipe.
Day 22 → A website.
Day 23 → A YouTube video.
Day 24 → Whatever tickles your fancy.

Day 25 → Your day, in great detail.
Day 26 → Your week, in great detail.
Day 27 → This month, in great detail.
Day 28 → This year, in great detail.
Day 29 → Hopes, dreams and plans for the next 365 days.
Day 30 → Whatever tickles your fancy.

Recipe:

A website:
It's my favorite.
A YouTube Video:

Whatever Tickles My Fancy:
My mom bought me Glee yesterday for a late birthday present. :) It was on sale for $15.

New Years!

It's only 58 minutes until 2011. When I think about it, I admit, I freak out. My chest, literally, tightens, and I feel tears start to prickle at the back of my eyes. 2010 has been the best year of my life, no lie. Sure, it started out as the worst, but a lot of things have happened that have made it worth wanting to relive. I've accomplished so much this year, both physically and obviously as well as mentally and personally. I'm confident and happy, done with high school, legal, about to enter the wonderful and magical world of college, etc. I've met some really cool people (such as everyone in Texas, and those awesome chicks at my lunch table as well as my co-workers in the kitchen) and done some really cool things (Prom, Homecoming, Rally To Restore Sanity, Drivers ED, GED program, etc...). It's silly to think that 2011 will be any less cool what with this new attitude, I know that, but I have my fears for obvious reasons. I will, however, push those to the back of my head and bury them under some scrap metal, for everyone's sake.

So. Currently, I am spending my night at home, pretty much alone, due to the fact that everyone is out partying. My brother, Josh, is having some friends over for the night, and they've taken over the living room, turning it into a temporary "man-cave". Seriously, there are five teenage boys down there right now, four televisions, and one game. The TV's are turned, probably, all the way up, and they're all screaming at them. I'm comparing it to cavemen yelling at fire for the first time. The mental image makes me giggle. I think they're taking a break right now, and searching for food, because all is quiet. Hm.

It seems as though I had something else to say, but I can't remember right now. I'm kind of out of it, too, so if anything doesn't make sense here, that would be why.

So, please, have an extremely happy new year, and please stay safe! I'll see you all in January!

Happy New Year!

Days Nineteen and Twenty.

Day 01 → Your favorite song.
Day 02 → Your favorite movie.
Day 03 → Your favorite television program.
Day 04 → Your favorite book.
Day 05 → Your favorite quote.
Day 06 → Whatever tickles your fancy.
Day 07 → A photo that makes you happy.
Day 08 → A photo that makes you angry/sad.
Day 09 → A photo you took.
Day 10 → A photo of you taken over ten years ago.
Day 11 → A photo of you taken recently.
Day 12 → Whatever tickles your fancy.
Day 13 → A fictional book.
Day 14 → A non-fictional book.
Day 15 → A fanfic.
Day 16 → A song that makes you cry (or nearly).
Day 17 → An art piece (painting, drawing, sculpture, etc.).
Day 18 → Whatever tickles your fancy.

Day 19 → A talent of yours.
Day 20 → A hobby of yours.

Day 21 → A recipe.
Day 22 → A website.
Day 23 → A YouTube video.
Day 24 → Whatever tickles your fancy.
Day 25 → Your day, in great detail.
Day 26 → Your week, in great detail.
Day 27 → This month, in great detail.
Day 28 → This year, in great detail.
Day 29 → Hopes, dreams and plans for the next 365 days.
Day 30 → Whatever tickles your fancy.

A talent of mine? I take pretty pictures.
A hobby? I collect snow globes.
Day 01 → Your favorite song.
Day 02 → Your favorite movie.
Day 03 → Your favorite television program.
Day 04 → Your favorite book.
Day 05 → Your favorite quote.
Day 06 → Whatever tickles your fancy.
Day 07 → A photo that makes you happy.
Day 08 → A photo that makes you angry/sad.
Day 09 → A photo you took.
Day 10 → A photo of you taken over ten years ago.
Day 11 → A photo of you taken recently.
Day 12 → Whatever tickles your fancy.
Day 13 → A fictional book.
Day 14 → A non-fictional book.

Day 15 → A fanfic.
Day 16 → A song that makes you cry (or nearly).
Day 17 → An art piece (painting, drawing, sculpture, etc.).
Day 18 → Whatever tickles your fancy.

Day 19 → A talent of yours.
Day 20 → A hobby of yours.
Day 21 → A recipe.
Day 22 → A website.
Day 23 → A YouTube video.
Day 24 → Whatever tickles your fancy.
Day 25 → Your day, in great detail.
Day 26 → Your week, in great detail.
Day 27 → This month, in great detail.
Day 28 → This year, in great detail.
Day 29 → Hopes, dreams and plans for the next 365 days.
Day 30 → Whatever tickles your fancy.

I haven't really read any fanfiction this year. The last one I skimmed through was this one. It's a Bourne fic.
Song that makes me cry? Man, there aren't really a whole lot... I can't say. Maybe Storm by Lifehouse?
An art piece? Hm. I like this one. Don't judge. It's got the whole mythology thing to it, which I'm a big fan of. Plus, I saw this statue in DC when I went in October. :)

Whatever tickles my fancy? I just had a badass sleepover with two of my bestest girl friends. And tomorrow, er, today, I'm meeting up with another one, who couldn't come because she was sick, and I'm going to meet another friend for the first time. :) Yep. That tickles me pink.

Nothing Special.

I just wanted to take the time, and use this space, to wish you all a very Merry Christmas. I hope everyone stays safe, gets what they want, and eats lots of food. :)

Merry Christmas!

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